Coffee With Ashley C + Morgen V
In this episode of The Art of Being a Therapist: The Space Between Training and Real Life, hosts Ashley Charbonneau and Morgen Villegas sit down for another installment of Coffee with Ashley C. and Morgen V. What starts as a conversation about personal highs and lows quickly becomes a discussion about family relationships, political engagement, professional frustrations, and the importance of finding community within the mental health field. And, naturally, there are a few middle fingers along the way.
The Work We Do on Ourselves Doesn't Stay in the Therapy Room
Ashley and Morgen begin by sharing their personal wins and challenges from the week. Ashley celebrates athletes from Team Hoyt Denver who recently completed the Boulderthon and Chicago marathons, reflecting on the joy of watching people accomplish something extraordinary with the support of their communities.
In terms of lows, Ashley acknowledges that making difficult decisions about relationships can be painful, even when those decisions bring freedom and relief. She also recognizes the work her past self put into becoming someone capable of making those decisions. Morgen shares a different experience: Unexpected reconciliation. She attributes some of her growth to her personal Internal Family Systems (IFS) work and her increased ability to communicate assertively, identify her needs, and recognize unhealthy patterns. Their experiences are different, but they illustrate an important point: Growth doesn't always lead to the same outcome.
Staying Informed Without Becoming Overwhelmed
The conversation shifts toward the weight of current events and the challenge of staying politically and socially engaged without becoming consumed by everything happening around us.
Morgen describes the persistent feeling that she isn't doing enough to create meaningful change. Whether contributing at the individual or systemic level, she wonders how much impact one person can realistically have.
Ashley acknowledges how difficult it can be to stay informed without becoming overwhelmed, angry, or emotionally activated. Even when that activation inspires advocacy, our nervous systems are still responding to stress.
Advocacy Is Part of Our Professional Identity
For Ashley and Morgen, social work values extend beyond the therapy room. Their discussion about voting highlights how complicated civic engagement can be, even for people who genuinely want to be informed and involved.
Ashley shares her experience researching a Colorado ballot, including candidates, constitutional amendments, propositions, local measures, and judicial retention questions. She admits that much of the ballot initially felt unfamiliar, requiring considerable time to understand what each question actually meant. Morgen echoes the importance of critical thinking and consulting multiple sources rather than relying exclusively on political affiliations, social media, or information that reinforces existing beliefs. Both acknowledge that researching ballot measures requires time, energy, and access to information that not everyone has.
Their conversation also raises questions about how public policies affect access to emergency services, bodily autonomy, and the well-being of communities.
For therapists, advocacy isn't necessarily about telling clients what to believe or how to vote. It's about recognizing that people's mental health is influenced by more than individual thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Economic conditions, discrimination, access to health care, community resources, and public policy all shape people's experiences.
We cannot fully understand individual well-being without considering the systems people live within.
The Mental Health Field Has a System Problem
Eventually, Ashley and Morgen arrive at their weekly thumbs down and middle finger segment. And Ashley doesn't hold back: Stop calling it self-care when the system is the problem. Self-care cannot compensate indefinitely for structural problems. A therapist cannot meditate their way out of inadequate reimbursement. A vacation cannot permanently resolve unrealistic productivity expectations. And a better morning routine cannot eliminate unnecessary administrative barriers. We need to stop treating burnout exclusively as an individual responsibility when so many of its contributing factors are organizational and systemic.
The Power of Professional Community
Fortunately, the episode doesn't end with frustration. Ashley's thumbs up goes to a recent supervision group where clinicians from different specialties, settings, and levels of care came together to support one another. Morgen similarly celebrates clinicians who are finding their professional identities, recognizing their areas of specialization, and learning how to collaborate with others.
We Can Love This Work and Still Want Better for Our Profession
One of the most important themes throughout this episode is that seemingly contradictory experiences can coexist. You can feel hopeful about change while grieving the state of the world. You can value your profession and feel frustrated by the systems governing it. And you can be a good therapist while acknowledging that the work sometimes takes a toll.
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